There’s no denying that being in love, true love, is one of the best feelings in the world. Relationships can be all encompassing for an individual and whilst some are great, others take a lot of work. But no matter what your relationship status there’s an important skill needed. One that’s often the basis of agreements, happiness and positivity. It’s compromise. What’s been most interesting as I’ve grown in age is what I will and won’t compromise on with a partner. A few years back, I would hardly ever compromise. I was stubborn, verging on arrogant; it was my way or no way. As you mature and find that one person that you want to spend the rest of your life with though, you come to understand the nature and importance of compromising. But you don’t have to sell yourself short and compromise on everything…
What I Will…
I’ve never been a big talker and used to be hugely influenced by gossip and what my friends said. In hindsight it’s caused lots of problems and confusion in relationships. I’ve learned that honesty is always the best policy and given Dan’s thoughts on communication (it’s essential), I’ve most definitely started opening up, conveying my real feelings and offering my opinions more. Communicating helps with anxiety, enhances trust and allows a partner to feel like they know you that little bit better. Without good communication a relationship cannot survive. Have a niggling issue that needs resolving? A bug bear that you need to nip in the bud? I’ve learned that communication is something to absolutely compromise on.
There will always be an invite that one half gets super excited over and the other considers to be on par with watching paint dry. Compromising here is easier than it seems. Hopefully you’ll have a big group of girlfriends to invite a plus one from and your partner can get that much needed ‘he time’.
When in a relationship you can have some of the best and most romantic holidays imaginable. But what happens when one half craves adventure and water sports and the other wants 5 star luxury in an all inclusive resort? Daniel and I are lucky enough to easily compromise on this and often we’ve had holiday’s that have a good mixture of the both. Remember that relationships last a long time so while in the present you’re off on a relaxing all in, next time you could offer suggestions on zip lining and sailing holidays.
What I Won’t…
From religion to values to morals, it’s important for me to be with someone who is likeminded. We both like to live an honest, balanced life and treat others with love and respect. If someone were unable to compromise on core life values, it can cause an immense amount of strain on a relationship.
Work is a huge part of my life and always has been since I was a child selling sweets on the street to passers by or 13 years old helping out in my Grandad’s office. I’m not shy to admit I’m ambitious and understand the nature of working hard to get where and what I want. I’d never compromise on my career goals and would expect my partner to understand how important it is for me.
Long Term Relationship Goals
Marriage? Children? Owning a home? These types of relationship goals can really define a future. If you want children but your partner doesn’t, can you stay with him? What if one wants marriage, are you prepared to spend the next ten years with someone in the hope they’ll change their mind? It’s important to be realistic.
What would you compromise on in a relationship and what aren’t you willing to? Xx
PS Check out the incredible marshmallows from Boomf – customise them with photo’s!
Such great points here lovely! I agree, there are the easy compromises, but core values and the general way in which you both wish to live your life – they need to be aligned!
Me and my wife enjoy being self employed and we’re passionate about what we do, but we have a simliar goal in living life and enjoying it (not being stuck doing things we don’t enjoy just because they are expected of us!) It’s something we discuss often!
Great post – and love those boomfs! We had those mallows bagged up with pics of us for wedding favours all over our tables – great memories!
Thanks for your comment Holly. So true, I found what I won’t compromise on so much easier to write than thinking about what I would… That probably says a lot about me!
So important to not confirm to society pressures. Dan is such an introvert but I’m more outgoing so I guess that’s a good ying and yang balance!
Congrats on your wedding xx